2020 - a year’s worth of words.
Expectant.
Immeasurably More.
Those were the first words I posted to Instagram on January 1, 2020. I was sitting in my seat at Passion 2020 in the Mercedes-Benz Stadium in Atlanta. I was surrounded by some of my absolute favorite students and we had just entered into 2020 by singing at the top of our lungs to our King, a moment of worship that I will not soon forget.
Swing wide all you heavens,
Let the praise go up, as the walls come down
All creation
Everything with breath, repeat the sound
All His children
Clean hands, pure hearts
Good grace, good God
His Name is Jesus
Those were the words being shouted when the clock hit midnight. Coinscidence? I don’t think so.
And so it began. A new decade? Or not. That’s a topic that could be up for heated debate, and while on that night I was ready to claim that the new decade was beginning and we were moving into a fresh, exciting, new ten years, I am now convinced that the new decade begins on January 1, 2021. :) I mean, do we really want 2020 to be the beginning of anything? Not I!
Early on in January, or maybe even late December 2019, I wrote this verse below on a yellow sticky note and attached it to my computer monitor on my desk. It seemed to apply to so much in my world, and I wanted to cling tightly to the promise that He is doing a work, even if I couldn’t believe it. And looking back, just the simple act of writing that verse down at the beginning of this year was a little promise from Him, even when I had NO idea of what would come next.
“Look among the nations, and see; wonder and be astounded. For I am doing a work in your days that you would not believe if told.”
As I sit, writing out a {few} of my thoughts, it is hard for me to wrap my brain around everything “changing” almost 300 days ago.
The kitchen table became my office. I began a growing collection of masks. “Social Distance” quickly became a term that made my skin crawl. Many, many days were spent at home. Worship was now done from my living room and without community.
Isolation. Sadness. Fear. Confusion. The emotions ran rampant and there were moments when those felt overwhelming and daunting. They were on every face, in every news update, silent but present in our Instagram posts. Even when the words weren’t used, it was written on the faces of those around us. Unspoken, yet felt deep in our bones.
We felt frozen, not sure how to move forward.
But God.
In His infinite wisdom and knowledge, He knew that 2020 would come. He knew what it would hold. And, He knew each and every emotion that we would feel as we progressed through the year.
One of my favorite things about my Savior is His kindness to me and how He stirs my heart to lean in and listen. As much as I hate to admit it, most of those moments happen when I am at a loss, when I feel I am grasping for understanding that is FAR beyond anything I can understand. Truthfully, this should be me, every. single. day, but my frail human spirit fails me often.
What are you getting at, you might be asking. What did you possibly learn from the madness that was 2020. How can you possibly even consider typing out phrases of thankfulness after a year like that? There has been chaos in our world. People have lost their lives. Jobs have been eliminated. Life as we knew it, changed.
Because He is faithful, friends. That’s why. That’s how.
So many things about 2020 have taught me to not take things for-granted. In our world it was so easy to find our rut, and stay there. To live life as it came, never really straying from what we knew.
And, for me, one of the things that I have been reminded of over and over again is my need for community. Community with my family. Community with fellow believers. Community with my co-workers and friends. While a “textbook introvert”, I learned that I truly need people. The Lord did not create us to live life alone. Prior to 2020, I had never known a time without those things, without my PEOPLE and it truly rocked me.
Friends, I could go on and on about the life lessons of 2020, and those just might come in subsequent blogs, but today as we enter 2021, I just want to encourage you with this…
When I wrote those words, expectant and immeasurably more, on January 1, 2020, I had no idea what was to come. I did not know that I would be worshiping from home or that I would not be ushering in the New Year with the college kids at a conference, but He did. I did not know that I would attend funerals of people I cared deeply for. I did not know that month after month I would be astounded at His provision. But, He did. In His infinite wisdom and grace, I do believe that I saw those words come to fruition this year. No, it may not have been what I was hoping for or imagining, but it was what He had planned. And that is where I have to rest - knowing that He was never once taken by surprise. He was not shaken. His plan was not uprooted or turned upside down. He was in control from the beginning to the end.
Just as we did not know what was to come in 2020, we do not know what is to come in 2021. I’d be lying if I said that the unknown is a little unnerving, but I believe my words from 2020 are going to be the ones I hold on to again. I will not let those unnerving emotions get the best of me. I WILL rest in the All-Knowing, for I know His promises are true, and that He is doing a work that I can’t even begin to imagine, even if He were to tell me.
I am expectant.
I am trusting Him for Immeasurably more.
Look and be amazed!
Happy New Year, friends!
